The DUFF

“For generations of high schoolers, you could only be a jock, a geek, a princess, a bully or a basket case.  But times have changed.  Jocks play video games.  Princesses are on antidepressants.  And geeks basically run the country.  I thought we were living in a brave new world, a place without labels.  But every so often, there’s that one moment in high school that changes your perspective on everything.”  Just when you thought high school couldn’t get any more like some sort of vicious social media-fueled gauntlet designed to humiliate and cause untold grief to nearly everyone, a new label pops up.  Introducing ‘The DUFF’, or Designated Ugly Fat Friend.  You might have hoped teenagers couldn’t get any meaner, but now they’re smearing horrible labels not just on their enemies, but their friends.  According to the Principal (Romany Malco), “It’s like a prison yard out there!”  Mae Whitman stars as Bianca, a whip smart, sardonic and saucy member of a trio of friends.  But her whole world is ripped apart when a childhood frenemy, Wesley (Robbie Ammell) offhandedly tells her she’s a Duff.  When the scales fall from her eyes, she realizes he’s right and takes immediate action by committing the ultimate act of severing ties in the digital age – she *gasp* unfriends and blocks Casey and Jess on pretty much every social media platform you can think of.

Now all alone, she seeks help from Wesley.  They grew up together and although their relationship is slightly antagonistic, underneath it all they really are friends with close bonds built up over many years.  Bianca asks Wesley for help to ‘un-duff’ her and coach her how to get her dream guy, Toby (Nick Eversman).  In exchange, she’ll help him pass a science class so he won’t lose his scholarship.  Thus begins a My Fair Lady-esque adventure that is extremely well written and thoughtful.  The writing is exquisite, witticisms racing past and exquisite badinage done with such easy nonchalance that it was a very great pleasure to watch.  This is not your ordinary teen drivel – like Bianca herself, it is shrewd, masterfully adroit, shrouding rather profound things under the guise of bright and effortless banter that shows an extraordinary command of the English language.  The eloquence, fluency in idiom and lingo, and exquisite phrasing was like catnip to my English Major soul.  Superlative performances from some very talented actors and even if the language occasionally sinks into profanity, it all seemed organic and necessary.  It’s wonderful to see Bianca take charge of the situation and be proactive in doing something about it, influenced by her mother (Allison Janney) who has built an empire helping women get through difficult situations, inspired by her own ugly divorce.  Despite the horrific digital barrages and bombardment by Wesley’s pseudo girlfriend Madison (Bella Thorne), Bianca presses on, essentially making the movie a master class in self esteem, true friendship and how to survive high school.

This is no ordinary hokey teen drama about the perils and pitfalls of high school.  It has a positive message and is chock full of fabulous dialogue to boot.  It makes important observations about having confidence in yourself, cyber bullying and what it means to come of age in the digital age.  It weaves crushing despair, horrifying meanness and effervescent joy into a spellbinding tale with an important message for today’s youth.  I see myself in many of these characters, making the whole story resonate with my own experiences.  It also makes it clear that while you can improve yourself, it’s important to still be you.  You needn’t be a clone of what you think is the ideal, you just need to be the best version of yourself and never abandon the wonderful quirks, idiosyncrasies and even flaws that make you special.  Really a marvelous and very satisfying movie and I think I’m going to need to watch it again before I sent it back.  Teen fluff this is not and stay turned during the credits for some very funny outtakes.  There’s some deep philosophy at play as well as some enlightening observations about life.  “In the end, it isn’t about popularity or even getting the guy.  It’s about understanding that no matter what label is thrown your way, only you can define yourself.” – BETHANY

For more information on this surprisingly sophisticated movie, visit the Internet Movie Database

Left to right:  Madison (Bella Thorne) Bianca (Mae Whitman) Wesley (Robbie Ammell), Jess (Skyler Samuels) and Casey (Bianca A. Santos).

The happy trio of Jess (Skylar Samuels), Casey (Bianca A. Santos) and Bianca (Mae Whitman).  Must have been odd having two Biancas on set.

                                        Madison (Bella Thorne), plotting another salvo with that dratted phone of hers.  This character is a far cry from her gentle performance in Blended.

                             Ken Jeong delivers a hilarious performance as a slightly bonkers Mr. Arthur, a neurotic teacher who unerringly skewers the entire proceedings with his over-the-top antics.

“I’m tired of being the approachable one. I want to be the dateable one.”

Let the makeover begin,  a fun experience fueled by a long term easy friendship.

All so Bianca can get this guy (Nick Eversman).  Toby plays the guitar and everything!  ” Look, I have a crush on this boy. His name is Toby Tucker. Maybe you’ve heard of him. Well, I can’t seem to talk to him without making a total ass of myself, okay? And you never seem to have this problem.”

Are you kidding?  You want me to wear this?  Not happening.

Trying on different looks.  I don’t think this one is a winner.

After scoring a date with Toby, accompanied by the Hallelujah Chorus.

Owning your Duffness and and holding on to true friendships.

 

 

Photos courtesy of CBS Films, Vast Entertainment, Wonderland Sound and Vision and Lionsgate (unless otherwise credited in clickable form)

The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

When I first watched this movie, I had no idea it was based on a YA series of books by Cassandra Clare. Therefore I was able to weigh its merits objectively instead of comparing it to the original story. This wasn’t a bad thing, because we all know books turned into screenplays often suffer in transition and once I’d read the books (which are VERY good), I found this one wasn’t just in a little pain, it was in agony. They got many, many things wrong, but the big one is the movie gives away a major plot twist that isn’t resolved until the fourth book. Who does that?!  It would be like having someone tell you a critical piece of information about Bruce Willis’ character at the beginning of The Sixth Sense.  Or worse, knowing who Keyser Söze is at the beginning of The Usual Suspects.  (See how I carefully chose my words so as not to actually make them spoilers in case you, as the reader, haven’t seen those movies yet?  You’re welcome.  But seriously?  You need to watch both those movies immediately.)  All that aside, the film was interesting enough to get me to read the books, which is always a good thing.

The story is an inventive spin on the genre of paranormal young adult fiction, starring a half-human, half-angel race of ‘Shadowhunters’, whose sole purpose is to protect humanity by policing the supernatural world and slaying demons.  Clary (Lily Collins) is a normal girl living with her mother (Lena Headey) in New York when she starts to see strange things that other people evidently can’t. People who are invisible to others, signs and symbols no one else can see, and even a violent murder at a club where she is the only witness in a crowded room.  And thus the supernatural world takes an interest in Clary, drawing her into a realm of vampires, fairies, werewolves, demons, angels and magic.  By way of explanation, the Shadowhunters say “All the stories are true.”

It’s the classic good vs. evil paradigm, but with enough ambiguity all around to make it interesting. In the books, the characters are well drawn and the dialogue is witty, even often darkly funny. Not so much in the movie, but there are excellent visual effects, gorgeous sets and some well-crafted scares. Judged solely on its own, this gothic romantic thriller is just plain cool. True, it was a little confusing and unclear about certain plot elements (such as Clary’s mysterious power with runes), but once I read the books, it all made much more sense. Casting Jamie Campbell Bower as gorgeous golden boy Jace Weyland was perhaps not the best choice, but that is just my personal aesthetic opinion. This was a decent introduction to the book series and I’ll be interested to see if they make more of them into movies. – BETHANY

For more on this movie with a very long title, visit the Internet Movie Database

Clary (Lily Collins) and Simon (Robert Sheehan) before things take a turn for the supernatural.

Normally invisible shadowhunters Isabelle (Jemima West), Alec (Kevin Zegers) and Jace (Jamie Campbell Bower) realize they have been seen.

Clary’s best friend Simon (Robert Sheehan).  Being classified as a mundane has to be kind of insulting.

Clary and downstairs neighbor Dorothea (CCH Pounder).

Jonathan Rhys Meyers as Valentine Morgenstern.  It might just be worth watching this movie just to see him in his tight leather ensemble.

Warlock Magnus Bane (Godfrey Gao), whose loyalties are a mystery but who definitely throws a great party.

Isabelle helps Clary get ready for a party at Magnus Bane’s in order for Clary to ask him for help.  “If you go looking like your mundane self we won’t get within 100 feet of Magnus Bane. He’s the High Warlock of Brooklyn.”

Clary getting a tour of the Institute, guided by Hodge (Jared Harris), stop at the statue of the Angel Raziel, whom legend says created the Shadowhunters.

On a mission to save Simon from the vampires, who took him from Magnus Bane’s party.

Where things almost immediately go wrong, thus Isabelle and the flame thrower.

Clary and Jace seek out answers in the City of Bones, watched over by the Silent Brothers.

             Clary seems to have a mystical connection with runes and can even create new ones when need be.

But when this is what you’re fighting, I say go with the super runes!

Some of the Shadowhunter runes.

 

Photos courtesy of, Constantin Film Produktion, Unique Features, Mr. Smith Productions, Don Carmody Productions and Screen Gems (unless otherwise credited in clickable form)

 

 

Star-Crossed

This show had potential, but never really managed to hits its stride before getting cancelled after just one season. The CW ventured into the realm of science fiction while still maintaining their young adult drama formula that seems to work very well. An alien race called the Atrians that look suspiciously human except for some super cool tattoo-like markings crash lands on Earth, where a human girl saves the life of an Atrian boy when everything goes pear shaped. Ten years later, they’re in high school with the whole Romeo & Juliet forbidden love thing going on. I really liked that every episode was titled with a line from Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet, but I’ve got to say that a lot of the conflicts in the show felt manufactured just to create drama. There was some interesting character development and a bunch of interesting sub-plots other than the larger “why can’t we all just get along” issue, but there were lots of inconsistencies within the narrative. A person would say or do something that was totally out of context with their established character, making the show plot-driven as opposed to character-driven. The writers did do a great job creating an entire alien culture, complete with exotic flora, way cool technology, social structure and even holidays. But at the end of the first and likely last season (unless it is resurrected by some miracle on a different network), I was left with way too many questions and puzzled as to the logic, or lack thereof, behind a lot of things. Peopled with beautiful actors and a premise that could have been great, I think in this instance the CW bit off more than it could chew. – BETHANY

For more on this not-so-epic romance series, visit: The Internet Movie Database

    This is a much used image of Emery (Aimee Teegarden) and Roman (Matt Lanter).  Does he look alien to you?

                                   Here they are as suitably adorable kids where Emery saved Roman’s life.

Grown up Roman is, admittedly, very hot.  What red-blooded American girl could resist?

Oh, but there’s trouble in paradise.  Not everyone is content with the status quo.  Drake (Greg Finley) and Teri (Chelsea Gilligan).

Oh, those tattoos glow when touched by water.  No clue as to why.  This is Sophia (Brina Palencia), a super-shy Atrian who just wants to be on the swim team, darn it!  (Episode titled ‘And Left No Friendly Drop’)

And because this is the CW, there is also be a less romantic but very hot human/Atrian couple hooking up.  Taylor (Natalie Hall), this high school’s queen bee and Drake.

Roman and his uncle Castor (Johnathon Schaech).  This guy is seriously sketchy.

Does this image really need any explanation?

   Emery and her sort-of-ex-boyfriend-it’s-complicated, Grayson (Grey Damon).

 

Photos courtesy of 360 Powwow, CBS Television Studios, Isla Producciones, Olé, Space Floor and the CW

But I’m a Cheerleader

This movie seems to be as conflicted about itself as the characters trying to deny their orientations. Not funny enough to be a spoof but too goofy to be taken seriously, it wound up in a strange gray area that defies description. It also seemed very confused as to what time period it was trying to portray. The vibe is largely the 1950s, but there are way too many more modernish things clearly visible, such as a 1999 pick-up and a Melissa Etheridge poster. The most lasting impression I got from this movie was sadness, although I’m fairly sure that was not intended by the director. The very idea that you could de-gay someone, to turn them back to being heterosexual was painful to watch, even if the message of the movie was trying to be uplifting. But the worst bit was the thought that parents could literally disown their own child simply because they failed to master the art of pretending to be straight. The ridiculous ‘True Directions’ camp was a sick mockery of retro gender roles, a misguided effort that only succeeded in providing a concentrated dating pool. I’m straight myself, but I have to say this movie made being heterosexual out to be the most drab and boring existence ever. We’re not all like that! There were some truly choice bits throughout the film (the gay guy shrieking as he tries to chop wood, for example) but they were few and far between. Also, Megan continually wears truly hideous frosted pink lipstick with absolutely everything, even her bright orange cheerleader outfit. Granted, that is a purely aesthetic gripe of mine, but I found this film to be a rather unpleasant experience. Megan’s character was so bland, lacking any real defining features of a personality.  However, Natasha Lyonne (who plays Megan) blossomed in her role as Nikki on Orange is the New Black  (where she’s also a lesbian, but proud of it), which I have also reviewed.  I do have to say I enjoyed the use of color throughout the film.  The straight people have a house decorated entirely in brown, whereas the True Directions camp is drenched in vivid pinks, blues, greens and every other color you can think of.  But using color in attempt to make this into an artsy film wasn’t enough to impress me.  A much better coming of age lesbian movie is Better Than Chocolate, which was an absolute delight. I didn’t hate this one, but I didn’t enjoy it either. – BETHANY

For more assorted information regarding this movie, visit: The Internet Movie Database

Megan (Natasha Lyonne) tries very hard to enjoy being a football player’s girlfriend.

Megan’s family, symbolized as agonizingly straight by everything being brown.

                      Welcome to True Directions!  A fantasy world where we tell you we can do the impossible.

Meeting the residents.  Sinead, played by actress Katharine Towne.

True Directions founder Mary Brown (Cathy Moriarty) trying to reinforce antiquated gender roles.

                             The inmates from left to right:  Sinead (Katharine Towne), Graham (Clea DuVall), Hilary (Melanie Lynskey) and Megan (Natasha Lyonne).

There are no words for this travesty.

                              As part of their recovery process, residents of True Directions are required to protest outside of known gay establishments.

Maybe if you immerse these teenage girls into every 8 year old’s fantasy of being a princess, it might, …  it might, … I don’t know what, but it might do something.

The poor boys trying to learn to be all manly.  Dolph (Dante Basco), Clayton (Kip Pardue) and Andre (Douglas Spain).

The instructor on the left, Mike, trying to teach these buys how to chop wood, is none other than RuPaul.  Love the tiny shorts!

                                 A very young Michelle Williams as Kimberly.

Rock (Eddie Cibrian) is director Mary’s son, whom she supposedly “fixed” and is now heterosexual.  *raises an eyebrow*

See?  Concentrated dating pools are great!

             Here’s Natasha Lyonne playing openly lesbian character Nikki on Orange is the New Black  (Image found on Pinterest).

 

 

Photos courtesy of Cheerleader LLC, Hate Kills Man, Ignite Entertainment,      The Kushner-Locke Company and Lionsgate

 

The Forbidden Kingdom

Quite possibly the best and most enjoyable kung fu movie I have ever seen. An American teen obsessed with martial arts movies finds a mysterious staff in a Chinatown pawn shop which whisks him away to ancient mythical China, a land of sorcery, gods, demons and warriors. Jason meets up with Lu Yan (Jackie Chan), a sloshed sot who fills Jason in on the legend of the staff, telling him the story of how the Monkey King crashed a party atop Five Elements mountain, charmed the Jade Emperor but was subsequently sucker punched by the treacherous Jade Warlord. Together they set off to return the staff to the Monkey King and by doing so restore order to the Middle Kingdom. Somehow this movie manages to make Chinese fantasy and mythology accessible to a Western audience, with all the rich magic of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and all the humor of Shanghai Noon. The fight sequences are amazingly well choreographed and it is worth watching the movie if only to see Jet Li (The Silent Monk) take on Jackie Chan in a knock-down drag-out fight that results in quite a bit of property damage to a perfectly innocent temple. Golden Sparrow joins the merry band, intent on repaying the Jade Warlord in kind for slaughtering her family and she’s quite charming (if a bit intense), despite her odd habit of speaking in the third person. The ‘witch born of wolves’ is downright freaky and I love how she uses her long white hair as a weapon.

Many movies in this genre tend to be weighed down by heavy doses of philosophy and fatalistic doom but while this one is certainly not all sunshine, it has a lightness to it that is refreshing and the story is told in such a way as to be very understandable. The special effects are superlative, bringing the story to life in a totally immersive way and enhancing the magic of the experience.  Absolutely gorgeous cinematography featuring some of the most beautiful scenery in China and an immensely satisfying journey taken by Jason as he suffers the teachings of both Lu and the Monk and learns what is really important in life. A classic coming of age story, I highly recommend you give this most excellent movie a try! – BETHANY

For more on this exceptional kung fu movie, visit the Internet Movie Database

How pathetic are you when you have to fist bump yourself in the mirror?  Michael Angarano as Jason Tripitikas.

Jackie Chan as cheery perma-drunk Lu Yan.

“He who speaks, does not know; He who knows, does not speak. Surely you’re masterful.”

Yifei Liu as Golden Sparrow.

XiaoLi Liu as the Queen Mother and Deshun Wang as the Jade Emperor.

                       Jackie Chan vs. Jet Li as Lu Yan and the Silent Monk.  According to Jackie Chan,when he and Jet Li shot their fight together, they found it relaxing and easy: “I have not worked with someone whom I’m comfortable with, in terms of movements, rhythm and natural reactions, in the last 10 years. I have done many fight scenes with others but there were usually more than 10 takes, which is a waste of time as the person may forget his moves and unnecessary injuries. When I fought with Jet, our actions were quick. We also didn’t have to do the same stunt over 20 times.” (source: IMDB.com)

Jason is literally caught between two masters.

                    The Monkey King seems to always be grinning.

                 Could the Middle Kingdom possibly be more beautiful?

The scenery is just spectacular.

The sets aren’t half bad either.  The Jade Warlord’s fortress.

The Jade Warlord (Collin Chou).

The White-Haired Witch (Bingbing Li).  Gorgeous costumes in this movie!

                         Bingbing Li on set.  The actress spoke almost no English so her lines were adjusted accordingly.  (source: DVD extras)

                               And there goes the hair as a weapon …

The Silent Monk, Lu Yan, Jason and Golden Sparrow.  Jason is much improved, no?

A piece of trivia from IMDB.com:  Jason Tripitikas’ last name is derived from Tripitaka, the monk whom Sun Wukong, the Monkey King, accompanied in “Journey To The West”.

 

 

Jackie Chan’s appearance on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson:

Photos courtesy of Casey Silver Productions, China Film Co-Production Corporation, Huayi Brothers Media, Relativity Media, Lionsgate and The Weinstein Company (unless otherwise credited in clickable form)

Teen Wolf

This is one crazy sexy show!  Teen Wolf is a rather self-explanatory title as the main character, Scott McCall, is bitten in the woods and becomes a werewolf. Not to be confused with the Michael J. Fox movie of the same name, this show is a big hit for MTV and justifiably so. It’s a supernatural teen drama but done so well as to be appealing to persons of any age. Well, I wouldn’t recommend it for the 12 and under crowd, but I’m sure you probably already knew that.  If you want a werewolf show more appropriate for a younger audience, I highly recommend Wolfblood, a British show with a less scary more innocent quality.  Teen Wolf has quite a lot of content I would characterize as spine-chilling and of a blatantly sexual nature, but it’s done tastefully and with masterful artistry.  There’s a great cast of characters making up the ensemble, many of which are strong females who can kick, er, behind with the best of them. The writers have incorporated legends and mythology from all over the world and it’s a real pleasure to watch a show with more than just “standard” supernatural beings.  Beacon Hills features exotic denizens of Celtic mythology, Japanese folklore, Tibetan traditions, Norse sagas, Native American tales and Aztec legend, with nary a witch or vampire in sight.  The werewolves themselves have an intricate societal structure and possess abilities that go far beyond mere transformation.

Visually breathtaking with magnificent special effects, this is an edge-of-your-seat thrill ride that’s insanely addictive. Each character is beautifully drawn and a large part of the show is comprised of all the complicated relationships between them. Of course because most of the main characters are in high school, much of the social interactions are heightened. Teenagers always think the smallest things are an issue of life and death, although to be fair, for this group it may very well be the literal truth. Great writing, nimble dialogue and inspired plot lines make this so much more than the vacuous supernatural melodrama it might appear to be at first glance. Dark but not depressing, slick but not pat, this is a wildly innovative show that isn’t afraid to do the unexpected or even the unthinkable. It’s easy to get swept up by all the bizarre happenings in Beacon Hills because everything feels so real, quite a feat given the subject material. Multifaceted mysteries, perfectly crafted scares and suspense plus genuine interpersonal relationships have intersected to produce this incredibly popular show, soon to premiere its 5th season. Sprinkled with humor and perspicacity that feels authentic while maintaining its eerie Gothic aura, this show is a masterpiece and I hope it runs for many more seasons. – BETHANY

For more information on the extremely talented cast, visit: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1567432/?ref_=nv_sr_1

I hope you enjoy this meticulously chosen gallery of pictures.  It was carefully assembled so as to give absolutely no unintentional spoilers (which a huge number of photos posted online do).

From left to right: Lydia, Jackson, Stiles, Scott, Allison and Derek.

Scott McCall (Tyler Posey) reads an appropriate book.

Personally, I think the werewolves look a teensy bit silly when they “change”.  I still wouldn’t want to see one in a dark alley, though.

                                                                          For me, Scott looks the best when his werewolf nature simmers just below the surface, as evidenced by his eyes.

                                        Scott’s best friend Stiles (Dylan O’Brien) is loyal and canny, but this class is obviously not his favorite.

                     Allison Argent (Crystal Reed), whose last name is a clue about her if you speak French, is not the typical girl next door.  Well, at least not to me.  No idea who lives next door to you.

         Lydia Martin (Holland Roden) is the object of Stiles’ desire.  Lydia’s objects of desire are always extremely fashionable and tend to come on hangers with expensive price tags.

Brooding and heartsore, Derek Hale (Tyler Hoechlin) is quite stunningly handsome (plus, he may be into bondage – bonus!)

                      Brother and sister Chris Argent(above, JR Bourne) and Kate (below, Jill Wagner), father and aunt of Allison.  This family really loves their weaponry!

Sheriff Stilinski (Linden Ashby) and nurse Melissa McCall (Melissa Ponzio), parents of Stiles and Scott respectively, deal with lots of inexplicable goings-on in Beacon Hills.

                         

A number of symbols with significance to the world of Teen Wolf.  (courtesy of wikimedia.org Triskele, teenwolffanon.wikia.com, and pixshark.com)

                     Just because it’s funny.  (courtesy of http://www.polyvore.com)

Photos courtesy of Adelstein Productions, DiGa Vision, First Cause, Inc., Lost Marbles Television, MGM Television, Siesta Productions and MTV

Under the Dome

I am not a fan of Stephen King, but fortunately I did not know this was based on one of his books when I started watching, otherwise I never would have given it a shot. Obviously I have not read the book, so my review is purely objective and based solely on the merits of the show itself. The premise is deceptively simple, featuring a mysterious dome that comes crashing down on Chester’s Mill, completely cutting the town off from the outside world (and splitting a cow in half – yuck!  And they show it over and over and over …). But the premise of Lost was simple too, an airliner crashing on a mysterious island somewhere in the Pacific, and that show had one of the most detailed and complex narratives ever. The comparison is apropos, as there are layers upon layers of mysteries and questions, both under the dome and about the dome itself, and nobody is really what they seem. But unlike Lost where everything was an unknown, part of the creepiness factor in this show is due to a familiar environment suddenly becoming alien and hostile. Secrets come to light and lots of things that would otherwise have remained hidden are suddenly thrust to the fore. There’s plenty of talent here with a huge cast of characters, but getting an acting job on this show isn’t likely to be long term as more characters tend to get whacked here than on Game of Thrones (which is really saying something!). There is great character development throughout, as each person changes and evolves to the point that it’s hard to know if there are any clear cut good or bad guys. The show does ask great questions, such as if the “government” requires you to surrender your guns for the safety of the general public, it also follows that only said government will then have readily available weapons. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Life under the dome acts as a microcosm for the larger world, illustrating the practical and the not-so-practical tenets of civilized free society. I think it’s fascinating and enjoyed the second season as much as I did the first. – BETHANY

Deputy Linda Esquivel (Natalie Martinez) discovers you can look but you can’t touch.

     Dale “Barbie” Barbara” (Mike Vogel) illustrates you also can’t hear through the Dome.

Angie McAlister (Britt Robertson), Joe McAlister (Colin Ford) and Elinore “Norrie” Calvert-Hill (Mackenzie Lintz).  There are a lot of shots like this of people looking on in dumbfounded amazement/concern.

When Domes become magnetic

This show has a thing for butterflies.  Monarchs, to be specific.

   Barbie (a dude, I swear!) and Julia, as played by Mike Vogel and Rachelle Lefevre.

James “Big Jim” Rennie (Dean Norris), a used car salesman cum town councilman who’s very good at looking out for number one.

Big Jim’s son, James “Junior” Rennie.  Yes, a lot of people on this show have nicknames in quotes.

   Photo courtesy of http://ijusthateeverything.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/under2.jpg?w=930

Photos courtesy of Amblin Television, Baer Bones and CBS Television Studios (unless otherwise noted)

Epic

It’s nice to see an eco-themed movie that doesn’t paint humanity as the enemy. Instead, this movie delineates the careful balance between the opposing forces of new life and decay. Call it Creation versus Entropy with both sides cleverly anthropomorphized into tiny civilizations. Although basic science dictates that you need both forces held in balance to have a healthy environment, it’s more fun to have the Boggans be the bad guys, characterized by mold, fungus, and fetid stagnation. The Leafmen, noble warriors loosely based on Japan’s Samurai, are the good guys and are on constant guard against the encroachment of rot in the forest. This is a highly creative story about an eccentric scientist trying to capture proof of his wild (but accurate) theory and his typical teenage daughter who falls into the mysterious world of the Leafmen by magic. Gorgeous animation, a fantastic soundtrack courtesy of the great Danny Elfman (Men in Black, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Batman Returns, Edward Scissorhands), and an eclectic mix of characters voiced by very talented actors (Colin Farrell, Josh Hutcherson, Beyonce Knowles, Amanda Seyfried, Johnny Knoxville, Steven Tyler and Jason Sudeikis, to name a few) make this a beautiful tapestry of drama, humor and emotion without being overly saccharine, cutesy or preachy. Funny, engaging and heartfelt, I really liked it and immediately purchased the DVD and soundtrack. Highly recommended for persons of any age, this is so much better than the usual silly and often trite children’s animated fare and I would love to see a sequel. – BETHANY

For information on the cast, crew and production details, visit: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0848537/?ref_=ttfc_fc_tt

Kooky professor Bomba, voiced by Jason Sudeikis.  Just what every 17 year old girl wants in a father.

The tiny Leafmen on their hummingbird steeds.

Ronin, leader of the Leafmen (Colin Farrell)

                          Being newly small changes one’s perspective.  Mary Katherine, or MK as she prefers to be called (Amanda Seyfried).

It pays to be able to blend in.

         MK and cocky Leafman Nod (Josh Hutcherson)

Queen Tara (Beyoncé Knowles)

Consulting the scrolls of convivial Nim Galuu (Steven Tyler, the big glowworm in the center).

(elmatpe.tumblr.com)

Dagda and his father Mandrake, leader of the Boggans (voiced by Christoph Waltz, who also played the part in the German dubbed version).

Photos courtesy of Blue Sky Studios and 20th Century Fox Animation

Hamlet 2

A character summed up this movie perfectly when he said, “I am simultaneously horrified and fascinated.” In order for my review to have any sense of perspective, you should know I hold a degree in literature and creative writing, studied abroad in England and earned a very high level certification for piano performance from the Royal Schools of Music, signed by Her Majesty the Queen. I’ve gone through four passports, own approximately 10,000 books, am a strong Christian and political conservative. Taking all that into account, I really liked this bizarre and utterly unique movie that contrary to its title is not a sequel to Shakespeare’s Hamlet. It’s irreverent, gauche, raunchy, overtly racist and stereotypical, sacrilegious, offensive and wildly politically incorrect, but I enjoyed it in spite of all that or possibly because of it. Steve Coogan plays a pathetic, washed up actor working as a drama teacher whom, in an uncharacteristic moment of clarity says “My life is a parody of a tragedy.” The script is a satiric take on the “teacher who made a difference” and the “put on a show to save the arts program” sub-genres. Though I found it ridiculously funny and slyly shrewd, I recommend you approach this movie with extreme caution. It’s not going to appeal to a wide audience and no doubt some viewers will absolutely hate it. Cloaked under all that appalling language, vulgarity and seemingly disrespectful religious content, I found something surprisingly profound that spoke to me on many levels and I’m glad I gave this very strange film a chance. – BETHANY

For more on this cockamamie movie, visit: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1104733/?ref_=nv_sr_1

          Oops, wrong Hamlet  (wikipedia.org)

Nope, still the wrong Hamlet.  But there is a play in this one!  (zazzle.com)

Believe it or not, this is the right Hamlet.  A still from the performance itself.

Dana Marschz (Steve Coogan) and his wife Brie, who has the biggest margarita I’ve ever seen (she needs it).

Skylar Astin and Phoebe Strole as preppy Rand and Epiphany (not kidding)

Dana with a sympathetic Elisabeth Shue (she plays herself)

Amy Poehler as lawyer Cricket, inevitably drawn to the controversy surrounding the offensive and by now quite notorious show.

Photos courtesy of L+E Pictures, Bona Fide Productions, ContentFilm International and Focus Features

Divergent

There has been much ado about this movie and while I enjoyed it, its Young Adult origins are quite obvious. There’s nothing wrong with the message about non-conformity but I found it to be just a tad simplistic. The underlying premise of this dystopian future Chicago is a little hard to swallow – who thinks it’s a great idea to pigeonhole each person based on a single characteristic? At least the system of government in The Hunger Games made sense in a Roman sort of way. Bread and circuses and the huge gulf dividing the wealthy elite in the Capitol from the downtrodden working classes in the 12 districts, etc. But other than my difficulties with the structure of their society I really did like the movie. I loved the sequences of Dauntless initiates doing increasingly wild and crazy stunts and the soundtrack was amazing. Kate Winslet is an ice queen, the super-slick leader of Erudite who obviously feels her faction is meant for greater things, but I’m not sure Shailene Woodley was right for the part of Tris as I had difficulty connecting with her character. Perhaps it’s the same problem Jennifer Lawrence had playing Katniss Everdeen, as much of the characterization in the book is of an internal nature and thus nearly impossible to film, but I think Lawrence managed to pull it off. Can I also just ask who thought it was a great idea to cast two actors who have played Shailene Woodley’s love interests in two other recent movies? Miles Teller in The Spectacular Now (2013) and Ansel Elgort in The Fault in Our Stars, (2014).  And to make it even worse in Divergent, now Elgort is supposed to be her brother and Teller is an antagonist. Awkward!  Did nobody think this through? I thought perhaps the books would be better but after reading all three, I was bitterly disappointed. Not only was the author in love with the word mammoth, and used it so many times it made me want to scream, but the story itself was just a mediocre blender of Hunger Games, Harry Potter and Gattaca, plus a little Nazi pride, with endless levels of conspiracies, revolutions and pointless ideologies, not to mention an extreme deficiency of logic. Juvenile drivel trying to be deep philosophy. *snore* – BETHANY

If you just know you’ve seen one of the faces in this movie somewhere before, look it up on IMDB:  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1840309/?ref_=nv_sr_1

                              Now if she only had the intelligence to use that gun …

I’ll bet he’ll regret getting those tattoos in 20 years.  They look hot now, but later?  Not so much.

I could post a bunch of other pictures with snarky comments, but I don’t think I can do better than this ‘Honest Trailer’ made by the Screen Junkies on YouTube.  It’s a trifle vulgar, but very funny.

And if you don’t mind spoilers or bleeped foul language, watch ‘Everything Wrong With Divergent in 18 minutes or Less’ – it’s long because there’s a LOT of stuff wrong with this movie:

Photos courtesy of Red Wagon Entertainment, Summit Entertainment and Lionsgate